Sophie Kinsella’s MY NOT SO PERFECT LIFE meets BAD MOMS: Since her mom’s death, Lanie’s been trying to keep her chin up and live her best life, no thanks to her MIA husband, wicked mother-in-law, and kids that need her for everything. E-VER-Y-THING. At least she has her health…or does she?
“A Filet-O-Fish. They gave me a mother flipping Filet-O-Fish. That sounds nothing like a Big Mac with extra cheese.”
“Agreed. And not nearly as high caloric as the entire pound cake you polished off yesterday.” My best friend Mikey’s sarcasm oozes through the phone like the tartar sauce dripping from the sandwich I didn’t order.
“What’s the point of a drive-thru when you have to leave your car to go inside and get what you ordered?” I slam my minivan door shut with more force than necessary and stomp my Crocs toward the Golden Arches. “And who the hell even orders a Filet-o-Fish anyway? It’s not even Lent.” I pause trying to orient myself to what month we’re in, but my mom brain isn’t computing. “It’s not Lent, right?”
“Beats me, Cupcake. You know I stopped going to church when Pastor Cal told me Adam was meant to lay with Eve, not Steve. Which reminds me, I have a date tonight.”
“Shocking.” Mikey makes a habit of collecting two things; men and designer clothing. Though to be fair, he used to be a buyer for Nordstrom. Used to, as in, I don’t get the friends discount anymore. Which as you can imagine, is super sucky. “Which dating app did you find this one on?”
“Tinder, and don’t hate because you’re hangry and eating a nuked triple cheese hockey puck while Jean Luc wines and dines me.”
I would love to see the full of this, sounds right up my alley and so fun! Please submit here: QueryMe.online/JessicaWatterson/Pitchwars and please follow all instructions on how to upload. Thanks!
I’d love to read more. Can you send me a synopsis and the first three chapters? Please send to email@example.com and include “Pitchwars” in the subject line.
I LOVE your voice for this, and the premise is gold to me! I’d love to see your first 50 pages of this manuscript. If you’d like to send, please paste your query and attach your synopsis and 50 pages to an e-mail to Kelly@corvisieroagency.com. Make sure to include Pitch Wars in the e-mail title, and I look forward to reading more!
Wishing you the best of luck,
I’d love to read more! Please send the query, synopsis and five chapters to firstname.lastname@example.org with Pitch Wars in the subject line. Thanks!