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Pitch Wars Showcase

Please note: These are the entries for the Pitch Wars season beginning in 2019 and continuing through 2020
PW2019 MG #16: THE CLOCKWORK STAR (Fantasy)
Mentee:
Brighton Rose
Mentored by:
K.C. Held
Book Title:
THE CLOCKWORK STAR
Category:
Middle Grade
Genre:
Fantasy
Word Count:
60,000

Pitch:

After getting caught being deceitful, young servant Christa is cursed to lie when she means the truth and tell the truth when she means to lie. But that won’t keep her from her dreams of airship adventures, especially when the Clockwork Star arrives in town.

Christa runs away and boards the ship in disguise, only to become a suspect when someone tries to kill the king. To maintain her innocence and stay aboard, Christa must beat her curse and catch the assassin—before they strike again.

 

Excerpt:

Christa was pretending to battle dragons when the invitation came. Chores dragged unless she made them adventures, so her broom became a sword and the attic cobwebs a dragon swooping to devour her.

The mail bell dinged and excitement flurried through Christa. She dropped her broom and raced downstairs, colliding with her mistress.

“How many times have I told you not to run in my house?” Dame Griselda snapped. She was a woman made up entirely of angles, from her pointed nose to her jutting chin to her sharp glare.

“Seventeen,” Christa said as she dashed outside. “Sorry, my lady.”

In the mail bin sat a bronze message cylinder with a rotor sprouting from its top. Engraved across the front was a falcon, the seal of the royal Aldercott army. Her heart pounding, Christa unscrewed the top and pulled out the invitation.

Cursive wound across the page like ivy:

The royal army humbly invites you aboard the Clockwork Star.

Christa had been waiting for the famous airship to reach Tannersville ever since the army had announced its recruitment tour weeks ago. She peered at the clouds above, but the sky still sat empty. She’d known all summer that when the Clockwork Star left Tannersville, she’d be on it.

12 responses to “PW2019 MG #16: THE CLOCKWORK STAR (Fantasy)”

  1. Laura Bradford says:

    You had me at “cursed to lie when she means the truth and tell the truth when she means to lie.” So hooky–like a way better Jim Carey movie. This sounds totally awesome! Please email me the full ms + synopsis and make a note in the subject line that this is a Pitch Wars entry. laura at bradfordlit dot com. Can’t wait to see more!

    Laura Bradford
    Bradford Literary Agency

  2. Alexandra Weiss says:

    Hi Brighton! I already adore Christa and would love to read more. Please send the first 50 pages of the manuscript to me at http://queryme.online/AlexandraWeiss/PitchWars2019.

    Thanks so much!
    Alexandra Weiss
    The Jennifer De Chiara Literary Agency

  3. Penny Moore says:

    Hi Brighton,

    This sounds so intriguing and great! I’d love to read more. Please follow the directions on my query form and submit your MS here: QueryMe.online/LiteraryPenny/PitchWars2020. Thanks!

    All the Best,
    Penny Moore

  4. Natascha Morris says:

    I’m very intrigued by this premise. It reminds me a bit of ELLA ENCHANTED. I’m curious how you handle the curse, Brighton. if you wouldn’t mind uploading, QueryMe.online/natascha/PitchWars, I’d be happy to take a look.

    Thank you!

    Best,
    Natascha Morris
    BookEnds Literary

  5. Adriann Ranta Zurhellen says:

    Hi Brighton,

    Am loving what I’ve read so far! Please submit the first 50 pages and a 1-2 page synopsis to arsubmissions@foundrymedia.com, cc’ing in flmasst@foundrymedia.com, with the subject line “Pitch Wars: The Clockwork Star.” Thanks so much, and looking forward to diving in further!

    Adriann

  6. Marlo Berliner says:

    You had me at airship! I’d love to read more! Please send the full with Pitchwars Adult in the subject line to marlo.jdlit@gmail.com. Looking forward to reading!

  7. Penelope Burns says:

    Hi Brighton,

    I would love to see this! Can you send the query and full manuscript to penelope@gelfmanschneider.com, with #PitchWars in the subject? Thank you!

    All best,
    Penelope

  8. Christa Heschke says:

    This sounds fun plus there is a Christa in it, so sign me up! 🙂 Please send the full manuscript and query to chquery [at] mcintoshandotis [dot] com. Please put “Pitch Wars request” and the title in the subject line. Can’t wait to read!
    –Christa Heschke, McIntosh & Otis

  9. Samantha Wekstein says:

    I’d love to see the first fifty pages of this! If you are interested, please send them as an attachment to samantha@thompsonliterary.com with your query in the email body and #pitchwars in the subject. Thank you!

  10. Andrea Morrison says:

    Dear Brighton,
    I really enjoyed reading your pitch – I’d love to read THE CLOCKWORK STAR. Could you send the full manuscript to me at amorrison@writershouse.com, if you’re interested in sharing?
    Looking forward to hearing more.
    All best,
    Andrea

  11. Kerstin Wolf says:

    I wish I was aboard an airship called the Clockwork Star! I’d love to read the full manuscript of this! If you think I might be a good fit for what you’re looking for in an agent, please submit your full manuscript using this specific link: QueryMe.online/kerstinwolf/Pitch_Wars

  12. I’m definitely intrigued by this one! Please send this pitch in the body of an email, synopsis and first fifty pages attached as a Word doc, with MG PITCHWARS and your title in the subject, to Jennifer@theseymouragency.com.