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Pitch Wars Showcase

Please note: These are the entries for the Pitch Wars season beginning in 2021 and continuing through 2022. Please note that our Agent Showcase ends at 9:00 p.m. ET on Monday, February 14, 2022. Agents will not be able to leave comments requesting material after that time.
PW2021 Adult #16: THESE DEATHLESS SHORES (Fantasy – Retelling)
Mentee:
P.H. Low
Mentored by:
Grace D. Li and Em X. Liu
Book Title:
THESE DEATHLESS SHORES
Category:
Adult
Genre:
Fantasy—Retelling
Word Count:
108,000
Manuscript Content Warning(s):
ableism, alcohol abuse, blood, child death, deprivation of medical care/disregard for personal autonomy, disordered eating/dysphoria, mentions of domestic violence, drug use, self-harm, sexism, suicidal ideation

Pitch:

PETER PAN x SHE WHO BECAME THE SUN in a Malaysian-inspired, genderbent retelling of Captain Hook

Jordan was once a Lost Boy, convinced she would never grow up. Now, she’s twenty-two and exiled to the real world, still suffering withdrawal from the magic Dust of her childhood—and the drug she’s using to medicate that withdrawal is wreaking its final, fatal effects. With nothing left to lose, Jordan returns to the Island and its stories—of pirates and war and the cruelty of youth—intent on facing Peter one last time, on her own terms.

If that makes her the villain…so be it.

 

Excerpt:

Nine years after leaving the Island, Jordan still hated the city heat.

She tucked her helmet tighter under her arm, breathed through the soup of air that stuck her synth-fiber body armor to her skin. Sweating spectators jostled her shoulders and leaned toward the ring below, where two fighters in similar gear jabbed and blocked and danced.

An otherwise even match, except one of them was going through karsa withdrawal. Even from up here, Jordan could see him shaking.

“Are you really the Silver Fist?”

She looked down. A boy of about ten stared up at her, grubby fingers clenched around a fried dough stick. No parents or siblings that she could see—and he was thin and tired-looking in a way that reminded her of Peter, of the Island, of worming into bed next to Baron with her stomach a shriveled knot of Pretend supper.

An aspiring fighter, then. Or perhaps one already.

She wondered if he’d ever dreamed of the Island—if he’d ever read the Sir Franklin novel or watched the movie adaptation and thought it, for a moment, real.

23 responses to “PW2021 Adult #16: THESE DEATHLESS SHORES (Fantasy – Retelling)”

  1. Ernie Chiara says:

    Hi P.H.,

    This sounds great! If you’d like to query me at QueryManager.com/ErnieChiara/PitchWars and include your full manuscript and synopsis, I would love to read it!

    Thanks so much, and best of luck!

    Ernie Chiara,
    Fuse Literary
    @erniechiara

  2. Shannon Snow says:

    P.H.

    I would love the opportunity to check this out!!

    If you would like to submit to me, email me your first three chapters and synopsis in Word format to Shannon@cmalit.com. Please put “Pitch Request” in the subject line.

    I definitely hope to hear from you!

    Shannon Snow
    CMA, Inc. Literary Agent

  3. Haley Casey says:

    Hi, P.H.

    Literally the very first line of this pitch had me fully hooked! (And no pun intended, though I like it now that I see it.) I absolutely adore retellings. If you’re willing, I’d love if you sent your full manuscript, synopsis, and author bio to me at haley@cmalit.com!

    As a note, if another agent at Creative Media Agency requests your manuscript and you’re interested in working with us, please only send your materials to whoever you feel is the best fit. (Though I do hope it’s me, I hope even more sincerely that you make the choice that feels best for you and your writing.)

    Thanks!

    —Haley Casey

  4. Eva Scalzo says:

    Hi P.H.,

    This sounds super intriguing and I’d love to see the full manuscript, if you are interested in sending it my way. I am always drawn to Peter Pan retellings that explore the Hook/Pan dynamic. You can submit the full here: QueryManager.com/evascalzo/PitchWars2022

    And if you want to know more about me, here’s a link to my website: http://www.evascalzo.com and my twitter handle is @evascalzo.

    Best of luck to you!
    Eva

  5. Sarah N. Fisk says:

    I’m definitely intrigued! I’m a sucker for a genderbent retelling!

    Please submit the query, synopsis and first three chapters here: https://querymanager.com/query/sarahnfisk/PitchWars

    If multiple agents at Tobias request your materials, please submit to the one you think would be the best fit.

  6. Paige Wheeler says:

    This sounds amazing. I’d love to take a look at more of your work. Please email me the synopsis and first 100 pages to me at paige@cmalit.com. Please write “Pitch Wars Requested Material” in the subject heading. Thanks so much!

  7. Bonnie Swanson says:

    P.H.,

    Hello! I am very interested in reading your manuscript. Can you please send it to me in a word doc to querybonnies@gmail.com?

    Thanks!
    Bonnie

  8. Mollie Glick says:

    Hi P.H.,
    This sounds great! I’d love to take a look. Please upload your material to booksubmissions.caa.com with “Pitch Wars Request” in the subject line.
    Best wishes,
    Mollie

  9. Penelope Burns says:

    I would LOVE to see more of this! If you’d like, can you send your query and full manuscript to penelope@gelfmanschneider.com, with #PitchWars in the subject line? Thanks so much!

    All best,
    Penelope

  10. Zabé Ellor says:

    Hello! What an exciting idea–I would love to see more! Please send the query (in the body of the email) synopsis (an attachment) and the first fifty pages (an attachment) to zrellor.books @ gmail.com (remove spaces.) Please include “PitchWars Request” in the subject line, and please only query one JDLA agent at a time!

  11. Erica Bauman says:

    Hi P.H.,

    Congratulations on your Pitch Wars entry! You have no idea how excited I am to see a Peter Pan retelling, and your pitch is incredible—I’d love to read the full manuscript! If you could please submit your query and materials using the following Query Manager link (so that the system flags it on my end): QueryManager.com/EricaBauman/PitchWars

    And if more than one ACM agent requests, please feel free to submit to them simultaneously—just let us know who else is reading and we’ll sort it out on our end.

    I’m so excited to read more!!

    All my best,
    Erica

  12. Jill Marr says:

    I am a bit obsessed with anything Peter Pan related at the moment. And I feel like Hook is the most interesting, least explored character.
    Please send the full manuscript in Word (with the subject YOUR TITLE: #PW2021 Showcase) to jill@dijkstraagency.com.
    I’m looking forward to reading more!
    Jill

  13. Roseanne Wells says:

    Hi P.H.,

    What a great idea and a terrific opening! I’d love to take a look; please send the full manuscript and synopsis to querymanager.com/roseannewells/pitchrequest, and I look forward to reading!

    Best,

    Roseanne

  14. Quressa Robinson says:

    Dear P.H.,

    Congrats on making it through the editing rounds with your mentor! I’ve been eagerly awaiting the opportunity to check out everyone’s showcase samples. Based on what I’ve read so far, I’d love to see more (I recall seeing an old version of this so I’m eager to see what you’ve done). Please query me at this link (QueryManager.com/QueryQuressa/PW2022) and follow the directions. If more than one Folio Lit agent requests work from you it is okay to query more than one of us, just give us a heads-up. Good luck!

    Thanks!

    Quressa

  15. Michaela Whatnall says:

    I’m a sucker for a Peter Pan retelling, and that last line of your pitch fully took my breath away! I would love the chance to consider your project. Please send a query and the first 50 pages as a Word document to me via Query Manager at this link: QueryManager.com/michaelawhatnall/PitchWars2021 If you have any trouble using the link, you’re welcome to email me instead at mwhatnall@dystel.com.

    If you’ve received a request from more than one Dystel, Goderich & Bourret agent, please only submit to the agent here that you feel would be the best fit, and let that agent know about any other requests you received from our agency. Thank you!

  16. Amanda Orozco says:

    Hi P.H.!

    I am such a sucker for modern twists on classic retellings and this one sounds fantastic; I’d love to see more of this! Please send the query and full ms to amanda@transatlanticagency.com with “Pitch Wars” somewhere in the subject line. Feel free to submit to other agents at the Transatlantic Agency if they also request; please just let me know so we can coordinate our responses.

    Many thanks and looking forward to reading more!
    Amanda Orozco

  17. Julie Gourinchas says:

    Dear P.H. Low,

    I first saw this on Twitter and knew I immediately had to go read the showcase excerpt. This looks incredible— and what a unique and interesting take on an old favourite story. I love the twist that a Lost Boy becomes Captain Hook (at least, that’s what I’m getting from this 👀), and a more mature, gritty approach; Jordan also feels like a very complex, realistic protagonist, and I’m intrigued to know more of her story.

    I am currently reading SFF submissions for John Baker at Bell Lomax Moreton, a U.K.-based agency, and he’s asked me to have a read of the Pitch Wars showcase and request manuscripts on his behalf. (You can read more about John and his taste here: https://belllomaxmoreton.co.uk/agents/john-baker or me and mine here: https://belllomaxmoreton.co.uk/agents/julie-gourinchas.) We’d be delighted to read more of this and would love to receive the full MS at julie@bell-lomax.co.uk and john@bell-lomax.co.uk.

    Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions!

    Best,
    Julie

  18. Matt Belford says:

    Hi P.H.! This is a great pitch and I’d love to see more of your work! Would you please send me your first 25 pages via my Query Manager form: QueryManager.com/MWBelford/PitchWars?

    Thank you!
    -Matt

  19. Cortney Radocaj says:

    Hi P.H.!

    I love the sound of this and would love to see more. Can you please submit your query, synopsis, and first 30 pages here?

    QueryMe.Online/CortneyRadocaj/PitchContests

    If another Belcastro agent requests as well, please choose one of us to send to and mention in your query who else has requested; we’ll be sure to pass the submission along to the other agent if it ends up being a pass 🙂

    Looking forward to reading more!

    -Cortney Radocaj, Belcastro Agency

  20. Katelyn Detweiler says:

    Dear P.H.,

    What an interesting, fresh idea! I’ve love to read more. Could you please send your query and full manuscript to me at katelyn@jillgrinbergliterary.com with “Pitch Wars” in the subject line? (Please note, if multiple agents from Jill Grinberg Literary Management request your ms, we ask that you only share with one.) Thank you!

    Best,
    Katelyn

  21. Sandy Lu says:

    Hi P.H.,

    I’m intrigue! Please send the full manuscript, preceded by your bio and complete synopsis (all in one Word document) to https://querymanager.com/SandyLu/Requested_Materials

    I look forward to reading more!

    Best,
    Sandy Lu
    Book Wyrm Literary Agency

  22. Chelsea Hensley says:

    This sounds fantastic! If you’re interested, you can send the full manuscript, your query, and a complete synopsis to my Query Manager at this link: QueryManager.com/Chelseahensley/PitchWars2021

  23. Laura Bradford says:

    I’m a sucker for a Peter Pan retelling! Please send me the full manuscript and synopsis (as attachments) at laura@bradfordlit.com and put Pitch Wars in your subject line.

    Thank you!
    Laura Bradford

    ***If you receive a request from more than one agent at Bradford Literary Agency, you are welcome to send to all agents who made the request, but just let us know when you send the material***