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Pitch Wars Showcase

Please note: These are the entries for the Pitch Wars season beginning in 2020 and continuing through 2021. The Showcase site will undergo scheduled maintenance on February 11 and February 12 from 3 – 4 a.m. ET. Please do not make any requests at that time.
PW2020 Adult #35: ME IN YOUR EYES (Thriller/Suspense)
Mentee:
Diba Bijari
Mentored by:
Damyanti Biswas
Book Title:
Me In Your Eyes
Category:
Adult
Genre:
Thriller/Suspense
Word Count:
79,300

Pitch:

Famed actress Ashe Stone’s identical twin is missing, feared dead. Heartbroken and mobbed by paparazzi, she devolves into a returning addiction, until she spots her sister’s coded message in the newspaper. Ashe unravels its familiar directions, but is she ready for what she’ll find? LITTLE SECRETS meets DARK PLACES.

 

Excerpt:

Everyone watches me as I prepare to erupt. The moment revs beneath my skin, building in my mouth. To be someone else, I need to dig into myself, but I have to watch how deep I go.

In the scene, my character stands outside her car. No one breathes on set as I loosely hold a phone to my ear, not hearing the voice on the other end anymore. The lights are dimmed. I blur out the angled cameras drinking in my expressions, which form slowly, building from the avalanche that’s rumbling in my chest. Ok, Ashe:

Let go.

The pine-scented air coalesces. My jaw unlocks and a sob rips its way out.

This is how you cry on cue: stop being in the scene and let reality press down on you. Let the phone drop from your hand, and the blizzard inside take over. Whenever I’m filming an intense scene these days, everyone thinks I’m engrossed in the character, but right here on set, with everyone watching, is the only place I can surge with private emotions. Here, they’re not mine.

“Please,” I whisper, touching the freezing metal of the car. Tears spill. Cold grips my knees, telling me I’ve crumpled to the ground. “Please.” My palms sink into the snow, and I’m not on set anymore. In front of me is the one I’ve lost, and it’s her I beg when I finally speak the words in the script.

“Come back to me.”

16 responses to “PW2020 Adult #35: ME IN YOUR EYES (Thriller/Suspense)”

  1. Mary C. Moore says:

    I’m intrigued! Would love to read more, please use this link to send: QueryManager.com/Mary_C_Moore_KCA/PitchWars

  2. Lori Galvin says:

    Dear Diba, Thank you for sharing your work. I would love to read more. Could you please send the full and a query letter with Pitchwars in the subject line to lgalvin[at]aevitascreative[dot]com

    Thank you again.

    Lori Galvin

  3. Lauren Spieller says:

    Congratulations on completing Pitch Wars! I’d love to read more. If you think we’d be a good fit, please send your query + full manuscript to Lauren@triadaus.com, and put “PW Request” in the subject line. I look forward to hearing from you! ~Lauren

  4. Jill Marsal says:

    Please send me the first 50 pages and list “pitch wars” in the subject line.

    Best,
    Jill

  5. Megan Barnard says:

    This sounds amazing! Please send me your query and full manuscript in an attached word doc using this link: https://querymanager.com/query/Mbarnard/PitchWars. Can’t wait to read!

  6. Dear Diba,
    I so love the premise and the voice here. I am obsessed with stories that explore the bond between twins and, in particular, stories where secrets about the people we thought we knew well are revealed. I’d love to read your full manuscript. Please use this link to upload your pages: QueryManager.com/1353/PW2021
    Thanks, Joanna

  7. Allison Hellegers says:

    I’m gripped! Would love to take a look at the full on this. Please put PITCH WARS at the top of the query letter. You can submit here: https://www.stimolaliterarystudio.com/Submissions – thanks! -Allison

  8. Samantha Fabien says:

    Hi Diba,

    Congratulations on completing Pitch Wars! You must be thrilled!

    Your comps are amazing and I always love the exploration of familial relationships in thrillers. Identical twins being one I haven’t seen yet. I’d love to request the full and continuing reading!

    If you’d like to share it, please send the query in the body of an email, with the full manuscript and synopsis attached as a Word doc.

    The subject of the email should be “Pitch Wars Request: ME IN YOUR EYES for Root Literary” sent to submissions@rootliterary.com.

    Although not all of Root Literary is participating in Pitch Wars, please feel free to query whoever feels like the best fit! We’re happy to coordinate internally.

    All the best,
    Samantha

  9. Victoria Cappello says:

    I’d love to read more! If you’d like me to consider, please send the full manuscript as a word doc to victoria@thebentagency.com and put ‘Pitch Wars’ in the subject. If another agent here at TBA also requests, that’s totally okay, we’d just be grateful if you would let us know if more than one of us has your work. Thank you!

  10. Jenny Bent says:

    This is great! Can you please send the full to me at pitchwars@thebentagency.com, and put “pitchwars” in the subject line. It’s perfectly fine to send to multiple agents at TBA if you get those requests, just please do let us know who else you are sending to so we can coordinate on responses.
    Thanks!
    Jenny

  11. Sharon Pelletier says:

    Hi Diba, I’d like to see more of this! Could you please send your query with the first 50 pages attached? spelletier@dystel.com . And if others at DG&B have requested, just pick who you think is the best fit for you and let them know with your material who else was interested!

    -Sharon Pelletier
    Dystel, Goderich & Bourret

  12. Jennifer Weis says:

    Hello:
    I would love to read some more material. Do you have 4 or 5 chapters you could send? Thanks.
    Jennifer Weis
    Senior Literary Agent, Ross Yoon Agency
    jenniferweis@rossyoon.com

  13. Jennifer Unter says:

    Hi Diba,
    We’d love to take a look! Please forward the opening 50 pages, as a Word attachment, along with your query pasted in the body of an email to jen.nadol@theunteragency.com.
    Thanks!

  14. Elizabeth Bewley says:

    Hi there! Thanks for the opportunity to read your pitch and sample pages. I’m intrigued! Can you please email me your full manuscript as a Word document attachment? My email address is ebewley@sll.com. Please include “Pitch Wars” in your subject line of the email. I’ll look forward to reading.
    Best,
    Elizabeth Bewley
    Sterling Lord Literistic

  15. Penelope Burns says:

    Hi Diba,

    I’m intrigued here! If you’re interested, can you send your query and first 100 pages to penelope@gelfmanschneider.com, with PitchWars in the subject line? Thank you!

    All best,
    Penelope

  16. Zabé Ellor says:

    Wow! I love how well you weave Ashe’s history into her voice here. I’d love to read more.

    Please could you send the query and first fifty pages to me, as an attachment, at zrellor.books@gmail.com? Please paste your query on the first page of your attached sample pages, and also in the body of the email, and include PITCH WARS in the subject line. If more than one JDLA agent requests, feel free to first submit to the one you think is the best fit.